Lucky Ones
by Josh Martin
James peeked out of the venetian blinds, hoping to see some sign of snow, but he was greeted by nothing but the colors of the grass and the rock beds in the courtyard. He slid his fingers out from between the blinds and turned towards Kay who was still sleeping in the hospital bed. To James, it looked like she was in pain, but he wasn’t certain, and he had no intention of waking her. Instead, he turned his attention back towards the window and gazed up at the sky, hoping to see a cloud or some other sign that snow was on the way.
After giving up on his hunt for snow, James turned away from the window again, this time greeted by Kay’s vibrant smile. Even though she was so sick, she still managed to look like she was happy with life. James had never understood how she could always be so happy, her life having been plagued with misfortune.
“Good morning,” said James, forcing a smile.
“Any snow?” Kay asked.
The smile that James had been trying to manage quickly faded. “Nope.”
“That’s too bad,” Kay replied. “I really love the snow. It makes everything seem all right.”
James didn’t feel the same way as Kay. He loved the snow, too, but he didn’t feel that it could make all life’s problems go away. In fact, snow was the only thing about the holidays he liked. Generally, he tried to stay away from all the hustling and stress that Christmas brought along with it.
“Have you gotten any sleep?” Kay asked, staring straight into James’ eyes.
“A little bit,” said James. “Do I look that tired?”
Kay paused for a moment before replying. “Maybe not tired. Stressed.”
That much was true. With both Kay’s parents dead, James was footing the entire hospital bill himself. Even before Kay had gotten sick, the two had had some troubles paying the rent for their apartment, and that was with both of them working. But James did not want to worry Kay, especially not in her current condition.
“Stressed?” James pretended to be puzzled. “No. I’m not stressed. I probably just need to rest for a bit.
“Then you should rest,” Kay replied. “You certainly don’t have to sit up here all day, waiting on me hand and foot. They have nurses for that.” Again, Kay smiled.
“Why are you so happy all the time?” Almost immediately, James regretted that he had asked the question. If Kay wanted to be happy, it was fine with him.
Kay looked at James for a long time without answering and then finally said, “Why shouldn’t I be happy? Everyone thinks you need a reason to be happy, a reason to enjoy life. You don’t.”
“Well, that’s a nice way of thinking,” James said, turning back towards the window. Once again, he found himself disagreeing with Kay. He felt that, while you didn’t need a reason to be happy, there were plenty of reasons to be sad that ultimately prevented you from being happy. He had once heard that if you were ever truly happy, you weren’t thinking hard enough. But he didn’t want to argue with Kay, so he quickly tried to think of something that would take them off the subject.
Before he could think of something to say, Kay spoke up. “James, what do you want for Christmas?”
James turned back towards Kay, this time with a real smile on his face. “I just want you to get better.”
Kay laughed. “That’s fine, but I’ll get you something even better. I promise.”
“What could be better than that?” James asked.
Kay didn’t answer him. She just stared at him and smiled. James didn’t care what Kay got him anyway. He just wanted to see her out of the hospital and back on her feet. “So, what would you like for Christmas?” James asked, his mood having improved drastically.
Kay looked up at James again, her smile brighter than ever. “Just one thing,” she replied.
* * *
Just one thing. It had been ten days since Kay had told James what she wanted, and now, on Christmas Eve, he didn’t have anything to show for his efforts. Having traveled everywhere he could think of during the previous days, James found himself heading to the mall, the most commercial place he knew. He hadn’t wanted to go to the mall, especially given the crowds it drew this time of year, but it was the last place he could think to go.
As James approached the mall, he observed one of the large Christmas displays in the main window. At the center of the display was a large Christmas tree, almost as tall as the window itself. The tree was elaborately decorated with a large variety of ornaments and lights. James thought that the tree itself was marvelous, but the rest of the display made him mad. Surrounding the base of the tree were all types of toys and games. In James’ mind, these added elements made the display little more than an advertisement. Of course, that’s what it was supposed to be, but he felt it cheapened the idea of Christmas.
“How commercial,” James thought. As he got closer to the entrance, he noticed a small child and her mother standing right by the window. It was extremely cold out and James thought they were dressed awfully lightly. Their clothes looked very faded, and the girl was wearing a flimsy grey jacket. For as dreary as their clothes were, James couldn’t help but find it funny that the girl was wearing a bright red bow in her hair. As he got closer, he could see that the child was gazing into the window and speaking with the mother.
“Mommy, do you think Santa will bring me that dolly for Christmas?” the child asked, pointing to one of the dolls being displayed.
The mother glanced at the doll and then looked back at her daughter. “I don’t think so, honey. That doll looks very expensive.”
“But I’ve been good all year,” the child protested. “That dolly is all I wanted.”
“I know, sweetheart,” the mother replied, “but I don’t think Santa will bring you that doll this time. Maybe next year.” To James, it looked like the mother was about to cry.
Not wanting to seem like he was eavesdropping, James proceeded through the doors and began looking around the mall. It had been a long time since he had been in the mall, and many things had changed. He was glad to see that his favorite shop, Things Remembered, was still there. James knew that that was where he needed to go, so he headed towards the small shop.
James went into the store and looked around. Much to his dismay, the interior of the store had changed greatly. It used to be a place filled with all sorts of wonderfully sculpted statues, ornaments and even some snow globes. Now, it was filled mainly with picture frames and vases, none of which James found very attractive. Tucked in one of the back corners of the shop was a small section with a few seasonal items, consisting mostly of small Christmas tree statues. In the center of all the statues, a small snow globe caught James’ eye. When he looked at it more closely, he saw that there was a small cottage in the middle of a forest in the interior of the globe. What impressed James the most was the fact that the “snow” inside the globe wasn’t the standard glitter that usually filled snow globes, but rather, it was the same substance that James had remembered from his childhood. It wasn’t truly snow, but it looked awfully close.
James picked up the globe and turned it over in his hand. Almost instantly, a frown fell across his face. The price tag on the bottom read ninety dollars. It wasn’t all that expensive, but with all the bills James had had to pay recently, there was no way he could spend nearly ninety dollars on a snow globe. Feeling defeated, he placed the globe back on the shelf and left the store.
As he tried to get to the exit, James saw a familiar little girl standing off by herself. She had a bright red bow in her hair, and James immediately recognized her to be the girl he had seen outside. She looked extremely sad and James assumed she was lost.
Temporarily abandoning his quest to reach the exit, James moved towards the little girl.
“Are you lost?” James asked, stooping down so his eyes were at the same level as the girl’s.
“No,” the girl replied. “My mommy is in this store.”
“Oh,” said James. “Then why do you look so sad?”
“My mommy says that Santa doesn’t think I’ve been a good girl this year. She says he won’t bring me the dolly I asked for.” She cast her eyes towards the floor.
“Well, why is that?” James asked.
“Mommy says it costs too much. She doesn’t think Santa will bring it to us because we’re poor.”
“Oh,” said James, suddenly understanding. “Well, I’m in a similar situation. I haven’t got much money either. But you know what?”
“What?” the little girl asked, looking back up at James.
“Money isn’t everything. You’ve probably got a family that loves you very much. You have a lot to be happy about. Some people don’t have a family to love them or even a place to go home to. You may not know it, but you’re actually a pretty lucky little girl.” James paused for a moment, reflecting on what he had just said and then his eyes lit up. “Thank you,” James said. “You’ve helped me out so much. I hope you and your family have a wonderful Christmas.”
“Have a good Christmas, too,” the little girl replied, sounding a bit confused.
With that, James got up and moved back down the hall towards Things Remembered.
* * *
James tucked the package under his arm and stood in the doorway of the shop, gazing towards the mall’s exit. Now, even as the mall was preparing to close, he found that the crowds were just as thick as they had been when he had first arrived. Realizing that it would be impossible to get to any of the exits without actually pushing people over, James found a bench near one of the mall’s fountains and sat down for a moment, if only to rest his feet.
Soon after he had sat down, another man joined him on the bench. The man was bogged down with bags and packages of all shapes and sizes. James could tell that he’d been there for quite some time as well.
“Good evening,” said James, extending his hand.
“Evening,” the man muttered, staring at James’ outreached palm.
James retracted his hand and replaced it into his jacket pocket.
“You haven’t got very many packages,” the man said, observing that James only had the one box which was now resting in his lap.
James looked down at the package, as if to make sure it was the same thing the man was addressing. “No, no I haven’t,” James said, looking up from his lap and back at the man. “Then again, I haven’t got very many people to buy things for.”
“You’re lucky,” the man replied. “I’ve got a wife and three kids to worry about. All of these damned toys the kids want are almost impossible to find. And my wife asks for the most expensive things you can imagine.”
“But your hands are full of gifts,” James replied, clearly taken aback by the man’s attitude. “Seems to me like you’re the lucky one.”
The man looked at James as if to say, “Whatever,” then got up and pushed his way through the crowd of people in an effort to reach an exit, leaving James alone on the bench.
After waiting for the foot traffic in the mall to diminish, James got up from the bench and proceeded out the doors.
Outside, it had begun to snow. James pulled his jacket closer, all the while cradling the package tightly in his left arm. The snow was not coming down very heavily, but James suspected that it was well below twenty degrees, although he had no way of being sure. Despite the fact that the night air penetrated his jacket and chilled him to the bone, James couldn’t help but notice the unusual calmness about the city. The streets were almost completely empty and the light from the street lamps was hitting the snow in such a way that the whole street seemed to be lit up. James gazed into the sky for a moment, but the chill wind soon got the best of him and he started towards his car.
* * *
The next morning, James drove out to see Kay. When he arrived, he took a moment to look at everything around him. James guessed that not many people had been out yet, as the freshly fallen snow was undisturbed and still clean, save where he had left tire tracks and now footprints. James went around to the trunk of his car and pulled out the small box, carefully looking it over to make sure the ribbon was just right, even though it didn’t really matter. After seeing that the package was just how he wanted it, he tucked it under his arm and went to see Kay.
“I know you only asked for one thing,” James began, taking the package out from under his arm, “but I saw this when I was out last night, and I figured you’d like it.” James carefully removed the ribbon from the box and then took off the lid. Inside was the snow globe he had seen the night before. James reached into the box, gave the globe a quick shake and then placed it neatly on the headstone marking Kay’s freshly laid grave. James stuffed the ribbon into his pocket and started to walk back to his car. Before he got there, he stopped, turned his head back to look at the headstone and added, “Kay, please don’t worry. What you got me was just perfect.”